Thursday, October 13, 2011

1001 uses

Why so glum, Maurice ? You’re not looking so pink today.

*Sigh* Well, Laars, this paper has come back rejected again. Nobody likes my results ! I admit, they are modest, and represent but a small incremental step in the march toward Understanding. But they’re solid results, succinctly put.

Hm. Many big words. Any pictures in there ?

Yes, of course ! Look at this beautiful histogram of flowgram values !

Err, I was thinking more cartoons. It is a nice little paper, though.

I think so too, but alas, the Reviewer and the Editor did not.
The boss’s orders are to add some « pep » to it and send it out again, quick.

Ah, Pep.
Um, what does that mean ?
Is there some secret neato-keen data we can add to it ?


Is there some astonishing new conclusion to be drawn ?

Does it go faster than light ?
Can you work the Higgs boson in there somehow ?


How about this ?

Hey ! That’s just the ticket !

This has gotta work.